Curb Stomp'd (but diggin' it...for the most part)

You wanna talk about depreciation schedules or amortization? Maybe basket purchases, asset turnover ratios, and how to dispose of those assets at the end of their service life? We could also get into Student's t-distributions and linear regression models if you're interested.

Literally no clue why any of you are still here (hi mom).

The last couple months my world has basically been a tossed salad of math, spreadsheets, reading assignments, and a couple stale croutons of creative work. There's also a side of Cub Scouts with Housefire No.2, and for dessert, an upcoming trip to Amsterdam for my rubber stamp documentary.

There's also our household getting absolutely wrecked earlier this month when we had to put down Clara the Dog. St. Anne the Wife and I got her in 2010 for our first wedding anniversary and over the last 12 years that English Bulldog was no question a member of our family. We knew Clara was getting towards the sunset of life, but her last few weeks went south quickly. We're incredibly lucky to have had such a great companion all these years and I'm glad we had the time with her that we did.

Regarding my school work, I'm freakin' floored with what I'm learning. Turns out the accountants and CPAs I've worked with over the years are true heroes and I'm absolutely not cut from that same cloth. There's also those statistical super powers and their potential I'm trying to comprehend that've basically made my head explode – in addition to literal headaches. One of our in-class examples last week worked through the actual correlation between political campaign results and the relationship to campaign spending. Freakin' fascinating.

Is this intentional mental torture getting me more creative work? No, not by a long shot. Is it making me think differently about how I approach what I do from a business standpoint? Unquestionably, and that's why I'm here.

We're more than half-way through our first eight week module and I'm stoked about my grades being as high as they are. On average, I've been spending nearly 40 hours a week studying and most the time I feel like I'm barely hanging on. Seeing as how flexible my freelance schedule typically is, I can't imagine how my cohorts are dealing with this nonsense in addition to the demands of a full-time job, let alone a family or personal life. I've got a shoot this week that'll have me missing one of my classes, and then mid-Oct I'll be seven time zones away during my finals week. I guess I'll let you know how that goes.

Speaking of seven time zones away, I'm off to Amsterdam to meet with some of the people behind Royal Posthumus. They're a company I'd learned about that played a major role in rubber stamp art as well as usse stamps to fight the Nazis during World War Two. I've been wanting to head over to do these interviews for what feels like forever at this point.

There's a bit of time during the week when I'm not getting curb stomped by my own choices and responsibilities. That's when both Housefires are bed and Anne and I have time to chill out and watch the internet. Chef's Table: Pizza is basically crack to me as a filmmaker who's interested in people and food. Atlanta, well, thank goodness for something interesting and original. And for something incredibly heavy but necessary, Anne and I started watching The U.S. and the Holocaust from documentary filmmakers Ken Burns, Lynn Novick, and Sarah Botstein (and a ton of others). It premiered last weekend and I'm sure it'll take us awhile to make it through the six-plus hour film, but good grief this should be required viewing for all Americans.

Anne and I started watching The U.S. and the Holocaust from documentary filmmakers Ken Burns, Lynn Novick, and Sarah Botstein (and a ton of others). It premiered last weekend and I'm sure it'll take us awhile to make it through the six-plus hour film, but good grief this should be required viewing for all Americans.

Fun Haircuts and Superpowers

Bit of a grab bag this week as things are staying incredibly fast-paced 'round these parts (school, work, family, etc.).

St. Anne the Wife and I hit 13 years still married recently and Josh Thomas – second greatest person in the world (behind Anne obviously) – reminded me of this gem he'd made from Anne and my wedding weekend. Good grief that seems equally forever ago and last month at the same time.

Not only did it remind me that I once had a fun haircut and an ill-fitting white suit, but there's also a young wedding photog in there named Andrew Ryan Shepherd. That same Dallas-based still photographer I'd been absolutely enamored with basically blew up into the creative and directing powerhouse he is today. That dude, who's now making commercial and film magic in Austin with Camp Lucky, turned out to be much more distantly braided into my life than I could've imagined.

In other news, I'm still machete-ing my way through managerial accounting principles and random probability distributions because this creative must have some kind of underlying punishment kink. I figured I could "lighten things up" and picked up another book I'd been eyeing from afar called Making Numbers Count: The Art and Science of Communicating Numbers by Chip Heath and Karla Starr.

"This book is based on a simple observation: we lose information when we don't translate numbers into instinctive human experience."

"When experts are asked to communicate something they understand intimately...they wildly overestimate how much of their mental model of the world is shared by their audience."

"Math can reveal truths about the world that the human mind was never built to intuitively grasp. If you can use math, you have a valuable skill. If you can use it and make it clear, bringing what is obscure and distant into the range where others where others can see it and feel it-well, then you have a superpower."

It's not a terribly long book and it's a nice change from the incredibly dense (to me) grad school books I'm hacking through. I'm only about 20 pages in and I'm sure I'll have more to say about it later, but seems like being able to effectively communicate complex ideas is a superpower we'd all be better having.

Math Nerdery

Well, if you need me, I'll apparently be drowning in math nerdery through the spring of 2024.

This past week was apparently out for blood as I started my graduate school work. I told St. Anne the Wife that it felt like I'd jumped out of a moving vehical and have yet to roll to a gooey and mangled stop.

You up to talk about Financial Accounting or Quantitative Analysis? Balance Sheets and Income Statements? Cash Flows and Generally Accepted Accounting Principles? R Programing, both Linear and Non-Linear Functions, and the freakin' Greek alphabet pretending like we didn't move on? Needless to say, my handwritten uppercase sigmas (∑) and lowercase mus (µ) look like they're written in the dark with my left foot in Crayon. My lowercase sigmas (σ) look a bit better, but even I'll say that's being generous.

Not everything is a complete and bloody mess. A few things that are starting to click and I'm seeing the beginnings of some kind of rhythm. Back in the day I used to breakdown my weekly schedule into fifteen minute chunks to help keep me on track and organized. That spreadsheet got dusted off and tuned up this past week to help keep me from burning up on reentry into the (online) classroom. I'm just staring my second week I'm already something like 34 pages of notes into my Moleskine XL for these two classes. Pretty sure Anne wasn't as hyped about my note taking Legend, color usage, and layout as I was.

Did I mention I'm still a cinematographer and filmmaker? That I'm still super stoked about what I do for a living?

I'm still curious as to how all this nonsense will mix together. I had a dentist appointment the other day and we got to talking about the idea of "If you want something done, ask a busy person." We could go around and 'round with that idea in a street fight against the value of being bored, but it looks like my 15min chunks of time dedicated to "this week's blogpost" are up. Still, if I can figure out and be fluent in RED, Arri, (especially) Sony, and Canon camera menu systems, surely I can keep up with the 80-100+ pages of reading, note taking, and other class work I'm doing each week (plus trying to be a good/decent husband, dad, creative, etc.).

Oh, and I also finished that 400 page Debt: The First 5,000 Years book this past week.

"You all, markets come from the military industrial complex, capitalism is a dumpster fire, and we're all doomed..." says the dude going to business school.

That Same "More"

I'ma let you in on a little secret: I'm kinda feeling like one of these three photos at the moment. They're all from the same roll of black and white film I'd shot in downtown Tulsa last month.

There's the gorgeous, tall, and gleaming building that, I'm assuming, is filled with highly qualified and credentialed professionals. They're the ones who, I'm guessing, wear suits and ties to work everyday. Not sure if there's white-shoe firms here in Oklahoma, but I'm guessing they'd be in a building like this.

Then there's the shorter, stockier brick buildings with the ornate trim on top. I'd guess the people working in these buildings are no less qualified than the armies of people working in that first building, but I'd guess it's a bit more business casual. There's probably whiteboards and dry erase markers scattered around the open floor plans with row after row of iMacs. I'm sure there's a few old school law or accounting offices mixed in there too with bad lighting and worn out carpet.

Finally, there's this lunchable sized billboard / light pole hybrid on the edge of downtown. No clue what's on the other side, but it's probably something like an ad for a pot dispensary or a lawyer who's most likely not working in either of those other two buildings. I'd assume both of those lights work seeing as how the glass isn't broken out, but you can tell that whole thing has seen better days. It could use a coat of paint, but it seems pretty low maintenance and is doing the thing. It's like that Simpson's meme of Homer in his underware, looking fit and trim, standing in front of Marge, but the reverse shot has all his back fat pulled back tight with a chip clip and straining rubber band.

That's me at the moment. I'm that light pole pulling double duty with those budget ads on my chest trying to prove that I'm suppose to be here.

What the actual fuck am I doing? How is it that I'm choosing to focus two years of my professional life as a creative in pursuit of a graduate level business degree? I've got this repeating memory bouncing around in my head of a conversation I'd had with a filmmaker I absolutely admire. I'd gotten a chance to talk to him during a conference years ago and told him about wanting to get an MBA one day. He looked at me like I had hot turds smeared on my face. "Why wouldn't you go for something in cinematography? At least something film related..."

Honestly, I'm super stoked about it. Even shitty magicians can be impressive if they have one trick that catches you off guard.

My MBA classes at the University of Oklahoma start later this month and we've already had a couple different interactions as incoming students. I'm already inspired by the people I've met and most of us are coming from very different careers and walks of life. Along with the business, finance, and economic professionals I'd expected, there's a surprising amount of incoming MBA students in my cohort who are medical doctors, engineers, lawyers, and those with military backgrounds.

In the conversations I've had so far with other incoming students, one was with a young pediatrician and his wife who were from Toronto. We got to the "So why you getting an MBA?" part and he talked about feeling creatively choked off with the restricted nature of his work as a doctor. He's hoping the additional education will open up other opportunities down the road. Some of the others planed to move into more leadership focused roles within their companies or captain their own entrepreneurial ships.

Seems like everyone I'd talked to so far wanted more than what they had at the moment. Even though I'm still feeling like I snuck in the side door, I'm no different in wanting the same more they each talked about.

Eating Up the Art Kids

Hot dang it's been another minute. If you've been around a bit you'll have noticed the growing gaps between these blog posts. There was that solid season were I was cranking these things out once a week, but now seems I'm leaning hard into this whole "once a quarter" nonsense.

If you've stuck around too – or if you read the previous post – I'd mentioned something about going back to school for an MBA. Well, here we are almost two months later and I've got four applications started with different Masters in Business Administration programs here in Oklahoma. I spent nearly all of March studying for my GRE (Graduate Record Exam) and relearning all the high school math I'd packed away with my varsity letter jacket. Being on this side of adulthood, I can promise you I've never had to calculate the area of a circle based only on the length of two sides of an interior right triangle. Freakin' hats off to the good kids at Khan Academy for helping me hobble through all the maths with their video tutorials.

In addition to studying for that freakin' test, I also hustled a handful of people I've worked with over the years into writing me letters of recommendation for my grad business school applications. There's also the financial aid nonsense to work through, plus the resume and personal statements to write up. I'm not too worried about that 500 word essay considering why and how long I've been interested in going after an MBA. That damn resume though...

Being a full-time freelancer in the film industry, I've yet to have an employer ask for a legit resume. It's normally a potential client asking for my demo reel and possibly previous work history and examples. All those goodies are on my website, but that doesn't cut it when reaching outside the circle I've been in the last twenty years. I'd rather mow every yard in our neighborhood with nail clippers than try and cram my professional experience, qualifications, and recognitions onto one 8.5" x 11" piece of paper.

But here we are.

Hopefully I'll know more and have another update in the next few weeks. Surely too I could go into the whole thing as to why as a creative professional I'm looking to get an advanced business degree.

"Businessmen drink my blood, like the kids in art school said they would." - Arcade Fire

On an actual cinematography related note, I smashed the soul out of my Mavic 2 last week with an "unplanned landing" and subsequently upgraded to the Mavic 3. Wish I'd have gotten the Mavic 3 Cine, but I couldn't find one in time considering how far I'm from either coast. Still, I'm digging the new drone but hating the basic remote it came with and the incredibly dumbed down software.

I also got to shoot on the new-ish Canon C70. It's tough to judge a camera based only on one two day shoot where you're actually never working with the footage. Buddies of mine have sung that camera's praises, but I'd still much rather run around with a RED or Alexa package any day.