Rusty & Wobbly

This past week had me back on set again for the first time in what feels like forever. Obviously it's not been forever but it felt like an incredibly long time. It was a wild mix of excitement and anxiety. Excitement because I'm absolutely getting to do something I love; anxious because I felt incredibly rusty.

It was a simple talking head shot and I could've done it in my sleep considering the number I've done over the years. I was incredibly prepared and given myself plenty of breathing room for the setup, but this time the bicycle I'd ridden for years felt incredibly wobbly.

Considering how slow my work has been the last few months it's just going to take some getting used to things again before I work out all the wobbles. Obviously SUPER helpful if you're a potential client looking to hire me and happen to be reading this nonsense, but it's been super helpful knowing plenty of my DP buddies are also coming out of their own similar situations too.

If there's any kind of bright side to all this, it's been helpful (and mentally healthy) to step back and realize what I'm seeing as wobbles aren't even a blip on the client's radar. My lighting was a bit flat and there was a slight bit of green I should've toned down more. Normally too I'd be editing for this client, but they hired out someone else and I was panicking at the thought of someone butchering the color correction. I was also working with a new gaffer and lighting units I'm not used to just yet. I'm looking forward to working with both again down the road. Also, that fancy new fluid head and tripod handled the additional weight of my teleprompter and audio kit like a champ.

210322-01.jpg

Seriously, me being close to a total mental meltdown because of minuscule details they'll never notice doesn't help my client. It's not like losing the memory cards on a travel job or breaking a lens. Seriously, mistakes happen, but I'm still good at what I do even if I'm a bit rusty at the moment. I've got another shoot this week with another client on somewhat of a similar setup, so I'm crazy thankful for another opportunity to sharpen up.

Covid has complicated everything and we'll continue to come across problems this season has and will continue to cause. We've all had major life changes during this garbage fire and it'd be foolish to pretend we haven't. In my situation I've had a general lack of work behind a camera – through no fault of my own – and I hate it. I hate it for myself and I hate it for the clients I get to work with.

Things change whether we want them to or not, but it's not helpful to sit and boil over about the world no longer being the way it was. This time of upside down still sucks, but I know I've grown and I'm stoked about how it's changed me for the better.